Busy Bee
June 19th, 2009 by Ana Scherer
Wow! I live in a busy city! Hong Kong’s lights are almost never out and I can see boats going back and forth even at the wee hours of the morning! No wonder putting emphasis on our “busyness” has become a way of life here and in most places around our busy world.
One of the most common responses to the greeting “How are you doing?” has become “I’m so busy.” It’s very tempting to start a conversations with these words because most of us are indeed very busy. The problem with this response is that it sets the tone for the rest of the conversation. It puts emphasis on “busyness” by reminding both parties how stressful and complicated life has become. Instead of choosing to spend a moment saying hello to a friend, we are choosing to spend even our spare moments emphasizing and reminding ourselves how busy we are.
Experiment this week with eliminating any discussion about how busy you are. When saying hello to a friend, focus on listening how he/she is really doing. If the conversation steers toward the “busyness” aspect of his/her life, offer to respond in a different way. Shift the focus of the conversation to something that he/she accomplished, something that made you smile, some good news you’ve just heard. The people you speak to will sense the permission from you to talk about something other than their own “busyness” and it will help them feel less stressed.
So, for this coming week, everytime someone asks you how you are doing, say anything except “I am really busy”.
I will be interested to hear from you if there were any shifts in your thinking! Drop us a note!
With energy,
Ana